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Check out new Under the Sun: Essays: Everything All At Once

"For everything there is a season, a time for every activity under heaven."
— Ecclesiastes 3:1 (NLT)

It’s a hot summer day, and I’ve just slammed my laptop shut at 5 p.m. on the dot—my first venture outside all day.

I’m dressed simply: something stylish yet practical (my eternal goal when getting dressed). But as I stand waiting for the bus, squirming under the sun’s heavy gaze, a voice creeps in:

You’d be so much better off if you had a car. Air conditioning. Speed. Comfort. Your peers have cars—why don’t you?

And just like that, it begins.

The unspoken, unrelenting pressure to have it all.

The thing is—I don’t need a car. If I’m being honest, I don’t even want one. But discomfort breeds comparison, and impatience gives rise to imagined necessities.

Add to that the sashay of ambition, who loves to appear uninvited and fan the flames, it’s…disconcerting. She means well (probably), but she could stand to let discernment lead now and then.

I’m halfway through my journey now, en route to meet a friend in the city. I’m surrounded by doers and hustlers and ground-shakers. Their energy is contagious. The car thoughts fade, but now I’m fixated on a stranger’s overpriced salad.

I remember: my wellness journey. Another open tab in my mind. A quiet call to “do better”?

I consider stopping for food, but I can’t decide in time—so I walk, a little hungrier, a little more hurried, toward where I’m going.

By the time I reach the cafe—an airy, art-filled space with plush couches, green plants, and quiet music—I feel slightly disoriented, as if I’ve jogged mentally through six versions of myself on the way here. But my friend greets me with a warm smile, and the static in my head starts to quiet.

We exchange pleasantries—What have you been up to? How’s work? Still running? Still trying to run?—and soon we settle into the kind of conversation that feels like balm. No need to perform. No deadline for clarity. Just the gentle unraveling of where we’ve been, and where we are.

Somewhere between the sips of tea and lazy scans of the buzzing room, we start talking about this feeling. The rush. The compulsion to optimize every moment. To make the most of everything—to be everything—before we run out of time.

We talk about the side hustles, the seven-streams-of-income culture, working hard yet hardly working, the rise-and-grind spiritualism dressed up in pastel fonts on Instagram.

It’s strange.

We both nod, a little tired. Not because it’s all bad; we’re ambitious—but we’re also just... people. People who crave rhythm and slowness and space to become.

Maybe that’s why this conversation, here in this cozy corner of the city, feels like rebellion.

We’ve been molded to be that other—divergent in our method, righteous in our drive. But we discover a quiet power in naming what’s true:
We don’t want everything all at once.
We want what’s right for us, at the right time. We want discernment over urgency. Substance over speed.

And maybe that’s the work—learning to lean into that truth and be unashamed, even when the world tells us to sprint.

As we talk, I realize that ambition doesn’t always wear a power blazer or speak in investor jargon. Whether you're building a start-up, managing a 9-to-5, freelancing on the side, or simply trying to show up for yourself in a season of transition—ambition shows up.

It looks like trying again after burnout.
It looks like choosing rest, not as an escape, but as a strategy.

For a long time, I thought ambition had to be loud, urgent, and constantly scaling. But I’m learning that consistency is its own kind of audacity—especially when the world rewards speed and spectacle.

There’s also something deeper at play: the cultural pressure many of us feel to prove ourselves. Especially if you’re young, gifted, Black, first-gen, female—or anything that places you even slightly outside the traditional.

Internalized is the idea that success must be earned quickly and visibly—or it’s not real. That you must not only succeed, but explain and justify your success in a way that aligns with society’s expectations.

That’s a lot to carry. “Self-advocate and self-promote,” “closed mouths don’t get fed.” No wonder we feel like we need everything all at once. And by all means—game the system.

But that’s not how lives are built. That’s not how deep work is cultivated. And it’s certainly not how purpose is found.

So I’m trying something different.

I’m letting consistency outrank urgency.
I’m permitting myself to be in progress.
I’m focusing on my lane—not to block the world out, but to better see what’s mine to do.

The sun’s set by the time I leave the cafe. The heat has softened, and so has something in me.

I walk slower now—not because I have nowhere to be, but because I’ve remembered I don’t have to outrun anything.

Everything doesn’t have to happen at once.
And even if it could, I’m not sure I’d want it to.

There’s something sacred in the quiet daily choosing, in the patience it takes to grow into the life you’re creating. Maybe that’s the real ambition: staying consistent with your vision, even when it’s not glamorous or immediate.

Perhaps, on some level, I did get everything today—not all at once, but enough for now.

Leave a comment - I’d love to know what ambition looks like to you in your current season.

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Check out my first essay below:

Share Under The Sun: Essays

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p.s. s/o to my mom, again :)

Find me on Instagram: @iamtoniiman

Find me on Instagram: @iamtoniiman

Find me on Instagram: @iamtoniiman

Referenced Article: Eurich, Tasha. “What Self-Awareness Really Is (and How to Cultivate It).” Harvard Business Review, Harvard Business Review, 4 Jan. 2018, hbr.org/2018/01/what-self-awareness-really-is-and-how-to-cultivate-it.

Find me on Instagram: @iamtoniiman

Find me on Instagram: @iamtoniiman

Scriptures: 1 Corinthians 13 vs 4-8 ;1 John 4 vs 8-9; 1 John 3 vs 16

Find me on Instagram: @iamtoniiman

Find me on Instagram: @iamtoniiman

Find me on Instagram: @iamtoniiman